Suburban Snapshots

Facebook Tips to Help Keep You
Sane Right Now

Monday, January 30, 2017

Whoo boy, relatives can be a bit much when they're riled up, am I right? You're learning horrible new things about the people you love, getting in long thread debates with the guy you only ever see at weddings but whose friend request you accepted because his Electric Slide is so on point.

Sometimes diplomacy in these situations is tricky — Facebook lets you block or unfriend anyone, but then your mom will call you crying because Aunt "Proud Birther" Louise can't see pictures of your new baby and Christmas is ruined.

Here are other Facebook functions that can help you filter or completely avoid certain people, posts, or conversations while remaining on each others' friend lists. I employ all of them depending on the situation and my level of sobriety.

1. Restricted lists make your status updates invisible to specific friends
To automatically prevent certain friends from seeing any of your posts (they'll still see your activity on others' posts) except those you set to share as "Public," use the already-existing Restricted List. Here's how.

You can also create custom friend lists, then customize your share settings to exclude those certain lists. For example, post photos from the day you called in sick and went on a pub crawl by sharing them with everyone except your "Narc Coworkers" list.

P.S. This is merely an example, Kim and I are still totally friends
P.P.S. I have never called in sick to pub crawl

2. Unfollow
Had enough of poorly-Photoshopped, inaccurate memes? Tired of being asked to "Share if you agree?" Can't resist fact-checking your friends' highly questionable statistics? Unfollow! Unfollow! Unfollow! You'll still be friends, but seeing their updates is totally optional.

P.S. Kim doesn't do any of these things and I totally still follow her

3. Stop comment notifications and unfollow individual posts
You commented on a friend's status update 9 hours ago but you're still getting comment notifications every 12 seconds — and you can't stop going back in! Stop the little red notifications dot, then practice diaphragmatic breathing or whatever.  Check out the different sanity-saving options hidden in this little menu.

These are intense, maddening times. It's all so overwhelming. Information is important, but we are the gatekeepers of our sanity. Pass these tips along to friends who need them, or passive-aggressively to friends you're about to shut down.

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